WHERE HAVE WE BEEN?

Apologies for the lack of updates recently boils ‘n ghouls. We here at Backwoods Horror have been experiencing some technical difficulties, and on top of that most of the office has been sick with some kind of devil flu from hell. Unfortunately, because of these issues, we haven’t been able to keep you up to date on the latest and greatest on horror news, reviews, and everything in between. Sorry about that. But now we’re back and ready to chew bubble gum and kick ass, and we’re all out of bubble gum. So get ready for the latest and greatest in horror and thank you so very much for your patience.

In the meantime, this is about how half the office looked for the past few weeks:

SUCKTASTIC SATURDAY WITH ‘VAMPS’

See what I did there, in the title, that thing about “sucktastic.”  Yes, that is indeed, sir or madam, a PUN.  First, here’s the story from SHOCK TILL YOU DROP:

The film and television rights for Nancy A. Collins’ young adult trilogy “Vamps” has been snapped up by Mukerjee-Brown Productions.

Shelley Brown and Lucy Mukerjee will oversee development of the series – which encompasses three books: “Vamps,” “Night Life” and “After Dark” – and are currently shopping the property around to various networks. “Vamps” was published last summer under the HarperCollins’ HarperTeen banner; “Night Life” followed last month and “After Dark” is due this July.

Set on the Upper East Side of New York City, the series looks into the lives of a group of prestigious bloodsucking daughters who attend night school at the elite Bathory Academy. There they learn to hone their abilities before venturing out for a night on the town. But their world is a sea of shifting loyalties, vicious rivalries and salacious revelations.

“With this fantastic series, Nancy has proved she has her finger on the pulse of the current teen sensation. The books of a Gossip Girl appeal with a Twilight edge and are perfect material for a hit TV show.”

After Dark Films founder Courtney Solomon is on board to executive produce.

OK, now, who, from that outline, in the horror community, is going to not take a giant shit all over this?  Come on?  How can you have more suckatude?  Gossip Girl Meets Twilight?  Fucking BRILLIANT!  Oh my GOD, I never thought a show could be worse than FRIDAY THE 13th, THE SERIES, but by golly they’ve gone and found one.  To quote so many YouTube commentors out there, “if you watch this, you are gay.”  Holy shit.  Just, oh fuck that sounds like such a bad concept.  Almost as bad as Stockholm Syndrome.