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“I’m a genuine, high-caliber, fucker-people-upper.” Well, this is about as ridiculous as it gets. The new red band trailer for MACHETE KILLS gets silly, bloody, gruesome and hilarious. If you want to save some of the outrageous deaths for the theaters, you might want to steer clear of this new trailer, because there are some wild kills, courtesy of Danny Trejo. Plus, we get a better handle on the crazy villain that Mel Gibson is having a lot of fun bringing to life and all his minions get in on the action too. Complete with hilarious one-liners, this shows us that Machete Kills is really going to up the ante on the grindhouse action comedy.


Danny Trejo returns as ex-Federale agent Machete, who is recruited by the President of the United States for a mission which would be impossible for any mortal man – he must take down a madman revolutionary and an eccentric billionaire arms dealer who has hatched a plan to spread war and anarchy across the planet.

MACHETE KILLS is directed by Robert Rodriguez (Machete, Sin City, Spy Kids franchise) from a screenplay by Kyle Ward based on a story by Marcel Rodriguez and Robert Rodriguez. The film stars Danny Trejo, Michelle Rodriguez, Mel Gibson, Jessica Alba, Demian Bichir, Amber Heard, Sofia Vergara, Zoe Saldana, Edward James Olmos, Charlie Sheen, Elise Avellan, Electra Avellan, William Sadler, Lady Gaga, Alexa Vega, Vanessa Hudgens, and Marko Zaror.



Source: Fangoria

 “GaGa is making the logical step into acting, with MACHETE KILLS?

Robert Rodriguez is currently underway on the sequel to his 2010 expansion of his GRINDHOUSE trailer, MACHETE. By all accounts, MACHETE was fairly tepid when it came to attempting to deliver exploitation thrills. It hit all the familiar over-the-top beats you’d expect Rodriguez to make (not necessarily a bad thing), but certainly didn’t push any bad taste.

I’ve been expecting much of the same from MACHETE KILLS. Stunt casting has been announced since the follow-up’s inception, with the likes of Charlie Sheen and Mel Gibson joining returning stars Danny Trejo, Michelle Rodriguez, Jessica Alba, the Avellan twins and newcomers Amber Heard, Edward James Olmos, Sofia Vergara and Alexa Vega. And it’s not that the casting of Lady GaGa is changing my mind on this, but it’s oddly perfect for her to get on the acting train here.

GaGa is ridiculous. While she means well enough in her activist pants, she’s often a loud, colorful amusement park attraction (that’s also crafted some bangers on the radio, no doubt). Rodriguez’s more purposefully exploitation efforts have the same silly flare. Ludicrous violence, posturing, attempts at smoldering cool and overt sexuality, and even some surface value politics. Much like GaGa, MACHETE exists somewhere between sublime fun and sheer eye-rollery.

It’s kind of a match made in heaven, and I’m curious. No release date just yet, but you can see the Lady Gaga/MACHETE KILLS character poster, introducing La Chameleon, below.”


No, not that OTHER flick called MACHETE, the one with THAT SWIMMING SCENE:

No, I mean the flick borne from the Trailer segment of the fantastic GRINDHOUSE.  This from Shock Till You Drop:

Not really horror, but spawned from the horror double feature experiment known as Grindhouse, Fox has won the bidding war for domestic distribution rights to Robert Rodriguez’s Machete, the trailer of which played prior to Planet Terror.

Danny Trejo plays the blade-wielding Mexican ex-Federale who is double-crossed by a crooked politician. The feature-length version was financed by Overnight Prods., who sold off international rights to Sony and several territory distributors. That provided the bulk of the money needed to shoot the film, which Rodriguez lensed last fall in Austin, Texas.

Written by Rodriguez with Ethan Maniquis, Machete boasts an all star cast with Robert De Niro, Jessica Alba, Michelle Rodriguez, Lindsay Lohan, Steven Seagal, Don Johnson, Jeff Fahey, Cheech Marin and Rose McGowan.



See, here’s the thing, I’m torn on this one.  On one side, I’m REALLY FUCKING STOKED ABOUT ZOMBIELAND, coming to us October 9th, 2009.  I mean, it’s Zombies and Woody Harrelson (who I dig in just about everything he’s done).  But then there’s that aspect of a rather high budget which always, for me anyway, seems to spell disaster for any zombie flick.  LAND OF THE DEAD anyone?  Ah, fuck it, you say ZOMBIES and I’m there with my Shotgun, Machete, and sixer of beer!  Here’s some information about the flick from the good boils ‘n ghouls over at Shock Till You Drop:

Woody Harrelson, Jesse Eisenberg, Emma Stone and Abigail Breslin play band of survivors who team to fight the living dead in the post-apocalyptic Southwest after a zombie plague ravages America.

The official synopsis: Columbus (Eisenberg) has made a habit of running from what scares him. Tallahassee (Harrelson) doesn’t have fears. If he did, he’d kick their ever-living ass. In a world overrun by zombies, these two are perfectly evolved survivors. But now, they’re about to stare down the most terrifying prospect of all: each other.

Fuck Yes, I’m seein’ this one!


Posted on 3rd February 2009 by aaron in News - Tags: , , , ,

Looks like the duo behind THE BURNING (That’s right, our friends The Weinsteins) have given a greenlight to a direct to dvd full length MACHETE starring none other than Danny Trejo.

This from

While drinking some tequila and just chilling I stumbled on some pretty cool news via ToutLeCine is reporting that Machete is moving ahead quote;

Interprète du héros buriné dans le trailer bidon, Danny Trejo (la photo) vient d’annoncer que les frères Weinstein ont pour intention rapide, avec la complicité de Robert Rodriguez (réalisateur de la si pittoresque bande-annonce et de Planète Terreur), de faire de Machete un vrai film

If you are like me and cant read a lick of french you probably are asking yourself, who? what? when? Did the martians steal my baby? Translated to English courtesy of my cat it says that Danny Trejo has confirmed a Machete film is coming and in fact it will be a direct to DVD trilogy. Or something along those lines.

Frankly my french sucks ass. All I can say is Robert Rodriquez is involved, The weinsteins are putting it direct to dvd and its either going to be a trilogy or a one off film. Those of you who CAN speak french feel free to email me a proper translating.