FREDDY KRUEGER, JASON VOORHEES TOASTERS COMING SOON

For those of you interested in seeing something other than the face of Jesus on your toast, Warner Bros. and Dynamic Forces are collaborating to create a series of toasters that will brand images from WB properties onto your toasty white or wheat. Friday the 13thGremlins, Little Shop of Horrors, The Goonies, and A Nightmare on Elm Street are just some of the property designs that will be available. Why? Who knows, but it’s weird and it’s horror, so I’m passing this oddity on to you.

BleedingCool.com received a press release today that may give us some idea as to what this insanity is all about:

These collector toasters will imprint iconic images from your favorite Warner Bros. films and television series onto slices of bread to make a fun impression on your breakfast, lunch or midnight snack! The extra-wide slots allow you to not only toast bread, but also bagels and more. UL tested and approved, it includes illuminated function buttons for cancel, reheat and frozen. The toaster design is a beautiful glossy black finish featuring the logo from the film or television series, and is a compliment to any counter top.

Hmmmmm, what’s really sad is that I might be interested in getting a Friday the 13th toaster if they aren’t too terribly pricey. We can look forward to toaster horror in September.

UPDATES: MY NAME IS BRUCE, HIS NAME WAS JASON, THE BURROWERS, & More

Howdy ho, folks.  Your favorite backwoods horror fanatic is back with some creamy horror updates from around the ‘net.  So sit back, open a cool, coors 16 ouncer and soak it up.

First up, we have theatrical dates for the upcoming MY NAME IS BRUCE:
• October 26: Austin, TX (premiere)
• Oct. 31-November 2: New York City—Sunshine Cinema
• Nov. 5: Philadelphia, PA
• Nov. 7: Boston, MA
• Nov. 9: Hartford, CT
• Nov. 12: New Haven, CT
• Nov. 14: Baltimore, MD
• Nov. 15: Washington D.C.
• Nov. 19: Columbus, OH
• Nov. 20: Toledo, OH
• Nov. 21-23: Detroit, MI
• Nov. 28-30: Chicago, IL
• Dec. 3: Madison, WI
• Dec. 5-7: Minneapolis, MN
• Dec. 12: Seattle, WA
• Dec. 13-14: Portland, OR
• Dec. 15: Medford, OR
• Dec. 17: San Francisco, CA
• Dec. 18: Berkeley, CA
• Dec. 19-21: Los Angeles, CA

Hopefully, this is just an initial theatrical run because not a goddamn one of ’em is near my neck of the woods in bumfuck North Carolina.  So Texas, Yankees, and Left Coasters get all the action.  Fuckers.

Next up we have an official Poster and Myspace Page for the upcoming kickass documentary HIS NAME WAS JASON.  Check it out!

And here’s a fresh still from the new flick from JT Petty, THE BURROWERS showing a bit of one of the monsters (though, if you ask me, it looks a bit like mongoloid Jason Voorhees trapped in quicksand)

What else, ah yes, we have a Wendigo flick comin’ out pretty soon headlining Superman himself, Dean Cain, called MANEATER.  Fangoria got their mits on a pic of the monster.  Click the Pic for more information and more pics.

Seems as though Guillermo del Toro is owned by the Hobbit for the next billion years, but Variety reports that he’s still in talks with Universal about releasing his definitive vision of HP Lovecraft’s AT THE MOUNTAINS OF MADNESS, and if you haven’t read Lovecraft, Fuck You.

Last up is a little youtube fan flick that I found hilarious.  It was featured on SHOCK TILL YOU DROP and showcases the GREMLINS invading various other movies such as The Exorcist, Batman, Raiders Of The Lost Ark, etc.  Cool as hell and done really well, so check it out!

Until next time boils ‘n ghouls…KEEP IT CREEPY!!