Review: SAVAGE STREETS(1984)

Posted on 10th August 2008 by aaron in Reviews - Tags: , ,

They Raped Her Sister…And Killed Her Best Friend…An Eye For An Eye

I’m not sure where to begin.  For a while now, I’d been hearing about this flick from the boys over at Deadpit for months now so when I saw it down at VSI, I just had to pick it up.  I mean, Linda Blair (The Exorcist, Chained Heat), how can you go wrong, right?  I wasn’t disappointed.  This flick had it all: Violence, Babes, and Bad Guys.

The movie starts by introducing us to two gangs, the not-so-violent Satins (Linda Blair, Linnea Quigley, Lisa Freeman, and some other bit players), and the more-violent-than-the-Satins Scars, a bunch of regular, convertible driving, leather jacket wearing assholes.  While the Satins are walking around in the city for a ladies night out in the town Brenda’s (Blair) deaf and mute sister Heather (Quigley) wanders out in front of a ’57 Chevy, unable to hear that it’s coming. (In response to Horror Yearbook’s Molly Celaschi, what it means when they say Heather is a deaf-mute is that she’s both deaf and mute, a real shitty combo if you ask me.) Brenda pulls her sister out of the way before the unswerving Chevy mows her down.  As the car skids to a halt, Brenda notices the occupants as a rival gang, The Scars.  Looking like a bunch of leather-clad dumbasses, we’re introduced to Fargo, Jake (the leader), Red, and Vince (the pussy of the bunch).  Jake asks if Brenda wants to go have a good time and Brenda more or less tells him to go fuck himself.

Later, while The Scars are beating the shit out of some d-bag, the ladies find their car unattended and decide to take it for a little joy ride (caaaaandyyyyycaaaaannnne, wait, wrong joy ride), leaving it smashed into a dumpster with a fuckload of trash inside it.  Needless to say, the boys are pissed.  Later, while showing up at The Satin’s school to beat the shit out of that d-bag again, Red happens to spot Heather and convinces the boys that it’s time for a little payback.  Red starts talking all nice to Heather, really layin’ on the smooze.  While this is going on, we get a good ‘ol “girl’s shower/locker room scene” with boobies flyin’ everywhere while Brenda and some slutty chearleader start bitching back and forth at each other.  Meanwhile, back in the gym, Red tries to lay the moves on Heather, but Heather tries to get away, only to find her way blocked from all sides by the rest of the Scars.  They drag her into the bathroom and then the movie get’s REALLY fucked up.

Ok, so, let me preface this with the fact that this is Linnea Quigley pre-boobjob so when the boys rip her clothes off and go to town on her, it really looks like they’re going to town on a little girl.  FUCKED UP.  What makes it BACKWOODS HORROR FUCKED UP is that while all this is going on, a crazy girlfight starts happening in that boobalicious locker room.  I mean, what exactly were the filmmakers trying to go for here?  One second, hot steamy girlfight, the next, a rape scene that wants to make you puke; WHAT THE FUCK!?  Once the boys are done, Jake kicks Heather in the head so hard it knocks her into next week; the girl’s comatose.  The Satins, finally noticing that Heather’s not around decide to look for her and find her sprawled out naked and bloody on the bathroom floor.

The next entanglement occurs at the local watering hole which confuses the hell out of me because it doesn’t look like these “highschoolers” are drinkin’ RC Colas.  They’re dancing around and having a good time when, of course, the asshole Scars have to come in.  On the way back from the ladies room, Francine (Freeman), one of the Satins, gets grabbed by Jake who proceeds to start feeling her up and tossing her back and forth to one of the other gangmembers like a hot potato.  Some guys rush to her rescue but get their asses kicked and Jake turns around only to find that Francine has pulled a knife and slashes the shit out of his face (actually, it’s just a little cut, but from the way he whines and moans, you’d think she cut his face off).

Well, this doesn’t go over so well with the Scar boys.  Now they’re out for blood.  One afternoon, while Francine is walking home, alone, the Scars catch up with her and start to chase her down.  She makes her way to the top of a bridge, but she’s cut off by that ’57 Chevy and the guys on foot.  Well, Jake just goes fucking apeshit and picks her up, holding her out over the edge of the bridge.  Vince has been having some morality issues and freaking out ever since the rape incident with Heather and he pleads with Jake to stop.  To no avail as Jake, crazed look on his face, tosses her off the side of the bridge, killing her as she splatters all over the pavement below.  Vince flips out and takes off.

Vince finds his way to the hospital where Heather is staying and makes his way into her room.  He starts laying off the waterworks, talking about how it wasn’t his fault, how Jake made him do it, etc. etc., and he would’ve continued being a wuss except that he’s interrupted by Brenda.  Brenda slaps him around to try and get some information out of him, but doesn’t get too much other than he was involved.  Later she makes her way to his house, tricking his father by saying she’s there to do a school project with him.  Once upstairs though, she pulls a knife and threatens to cut him wide open if he doesn’t spill the beans, which, he does, of course, because he’s a pussy.

Then things REALLY get good.  Brenda decides that to best act out her revenge, she’ll need to wear a black, skintight outfit zipped only halfway up, for ventilation, I’m sure.  I’m not going to spoil how she goes about getting her revenge, but needless to say, she does kick a decent bit of ass while delivering the B-movie standard quotient of bad one-liners.

The Deadpit boys didn’t let me down.  This really was a fun movie to watch (except the rape bits, that was just…jeeez).  There was plenty of action, plenty of violence, and plenty of boobs.  The gore was a little on the low side with not enough of the red stuff for my taste, but for an action/rape/revenge flick, SAVAGE STREETS did a pretty good job.  There are some plot holes and subplots that never go anywhere, but if you’re like me, you’re not watching this movie for its brilliant writing.  It makes no qualms about what it is.  I’d definitely say go check it out!  A new 2-disc collectors DVD is going to be coming out September 23rd, so save your pennies kiddos and mark your calendars, because this is definitely on my list of recommended viewing (if only for the fact you get to see Linda Blairs bodacious boobs in a gratuitous bathtub sequence).  Check it out.

Linda Blair Tub Scene After The Break…
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New Pumpkinhead DVD Art?

Posted on 9th August 2008 by aaron in News - Tags: , ,

The boys over at Shock Till You Drop were sent yet another bit of art for the new Pumpkinhead Collector Edition DVD release from their pals at MGM.  Check it out:

I have to say I like it better than the previous art.

In other news, contrary to what I reported HERE, it seems that Trick ‘r Treat is still at Warner Brothers with no actual news as to when we’ll get to see the fuckin’ thing.  Just fuckin’ release it already WB!

And on a more personal note, I’m actually getting a horror convention right here in my little neck of the woods.  To that, I have to say, HOLY SHIT!  The only big name thus far is Ken Kirzinger, but hell, maybe we’ll get a few more.  With any luck, attendance will be fucking killer and this will happen every year from now on.  It’s fucking Christmas!

FUCKING YES!

VHS REVIEW: HUNTER’S BLOOD (1987)

“Out There, No One Can Hear You Scream.”

Year Of Release: 1987
Format:  VHS Slipcase
Distributor: Embassy Home Entertainment 

The film follows five intrepid hunters (played by Sam Bottoms, Clu Gulager, Ken Swofford, Joey Travolta, and Mayf Nutter) as they decide to go on their annual camping/hunting trip into the deep dark woods of the south that Al’s(Swofford) company just purchased for development.  Al and Mason(Gulagar) pick up David(Bottoms) early in the morning, taking him from the loving arms of his new bride Melanie(a young Kim Delaney).  At the airport they round out the rest of the ragtag group by picking up Ralph(Nutter), Al’s brother, and Marty(Travolta, yes, John’s brother).  David is working towards becoming a doctor, Al owns a successful development company, It’s never clear as to what Mason does, Ralph’s the drunken big city lawyer, and Marty is the whiney son of one of his clients that just HAD to come along.  Once set to go, they head off towards the Southern mountains in a huge SUV (ah, back when gas prices wouldn’t drive you broke and you could drive a sweet, huge, mother of a 4×4).After the popularity of DELIVERANCE, as with any     popular movie, a rather large swath of copycats, some good, some downright awful.  Movies such as SOUTHERN COMFORT, RITUALS, WITHOUT WARNING, THE FINAL TERROR, etc. were produced during the late 70’s and throughout the 80’s.  One such flick that, fortunately for me, falls into the “good” category is HUNTER’S BLOOD.

They all get to know each other a little better on the way, explaining what they do and who they are for the benefit of the newcomer Marty.  When the pavement turns to dirt is when the fun begins.  They pull up to this gas station in the middle of nowhere to fill up (for friggin’ $20, FUCK). While Al goes in to look for beer, the others stay in the SUV.  They notice a couple of cliche’d “good ‘ol boys” standin’ over a barbecue pit, faces smeared with sauce and blood.  The new blood, Marty, mr. yankee accent and all, decides to start taking pictures against the better judgement of the others.  Needless to say, the good ‘ol boys come strollin’ over. “Whatchoo want with mah pikture, I ain’t never done nuthin’ ta you.”  Marty clams up and the talkative of the two hillbillies starts making threats.  This is the first time Mason demonstrates a somewhat edgier side to him by telling the good ‘ol boy that there’s no film in the camera, just as he’s ripping the film out.  About that time, Al comes out, unsuccessful at finding any beer, and they take off.

On down the road a ways, they spot a juke joint, redneck lookin’ place they all refer to as a “redneck bar”.  Looking for a bit of adventure, they decide to stop and check it out, with Marty saying “I’ve never been to no redneck bar before.”  The sign on the door even says “No Colords.”  When they walk into the place (which looks kind of like the interior of the Boar’s Nest from Dukes of Hazzard), a hushed silence falls over the whopping 5 customers.  The barmaid informs them that they’ve got a choice of Bud and Bud.  Drinkin’ their beers, David decides to have a little fun with her and talk all about his relation to Bruce Springstein.  Just as she starts to believe him, the boys start laughing and then the trouble starts.  The 5 customers in the back get up and tell the others that they’re not leavin’ until they pay $50 a piece, and the big one pulls a knife.  Mason goes into ass kicking gear and tears the fucker a new one, afterward demanding a case of beers.  Then, of course, they split.

There’s a chase, Dukes Style, down a country dirt road, but the city slickers lose them by hopping a ditch and off roading it into the woods where the rednecks can’t follow.  Once in the woods, they drive around for a bit and then stop to set up camp.  While the others are goofing off, Mason and David decide to take their guns and wander around the area when they run into some spooked forest rangers.  The forest rangers play the part of the “crazy guy warning the kids to get lost before they’re…DOOMED”.  They talk of a tribe of wildmen living in the woods, slaughtering deer for meat they sell to some unscrupulous meat company for hamburgers (Razorback Meats), and they wouldn’t be too happy to find anyone in “their” woods.  On the way back to camp, Mason spots some boot prints circling the camp that don’t belong to any of the group.

That night, part of that wildman tribe comes into camp and starts to harrass the city boys, threatening to take their boots and rape them.  Mason and David pop out of the woods with guns to chase them off.  This is the first encounter of many that sets off a string of extreme backwoods violence as the tribe of wildmen begin to stalk and hunt the group of city boys, much like DELIVERANCE.

Among the DELIVERANCE clones, this one does a pretty good job.  The director never claims to be doing something original and the original advertising for the straight to video flick has a tagline reading “In the vein of Deliverance.”  The hillbilly cheese factor is played up in spades, creating a sometimes menacing, sometimes laughable atmosphere.  The gore, though sparse, is pretty good with plenty of squibs.  There are a few memorable gags like a kinfe if the throat, Melanie using deer antlers to stab a guy to death, and an awesome scene where a guys face is blown away by a shotgun and we see his twitching body laying on the ground, head half gone.  The characters were rather likeable, even the whiney Marty, but, I mean, there’s ALWAYS a whiney one and someone has to play the role.  Billy Drago plays one of the crazy redneck wildmen and he’s ALWAYS creepy.  I mean, everything that guy is IN, even when he’s playing a good guy, he’s creepy as fuck.

So far, HUNTER’S BLOOD isn’t out on dvd, unless of course you count a bootleg copy (and they’re out there, of course).  But if you can find it on VHS and you love rednecks-chasin’-city-boys-in-the-woods movies,then definitely check this one out!

Click on the photo below for a better shot of the full box art:

Miko Macabre

Posted on 6th August 2008 by aaron in News,Reviews - Tags: , , , , ,

For any of you out there who DON’T know the name Miko Macabre, it’s time for a short education.  I first heard the name on the first, THE FIRST, horror talk radio show put on by the Deadpit boys in Eastern Kentucky.  She called in and they mentioned something about her show on YouTube.  Intrigued, I sought her out.  Sure enough, her show, Cryptique, was indeed awesome.  In fact, I’d say she’s the new Elvira.

The premise of the show follows Miko in a crypt (basement) as she reviews some of the best (and worst) that horror has to give us.  The show is perfect, with the right amount of bad, dry humor, and kitschy set pieces, not that these are bad things, they’re EXACTLY what’s needed in a show like hers.  Here’s a description of who she is in her own words from her Myspace page:

“Just a small town ghoul, livin’ in a lonely world.

But seriously, I’m just a girl who reallys like horror films. Good horror films, bad horror films, old horror films, new horror films, low budget horror films…medium budget horror films. You get the picture.

I have an especial propensity for zombie and supernatural flicks, but I don’t mind a good slasher once in a while.

But most of all, I love campy horror films. The nonsensical dialog, the bad acting, the terrible special effects–it’s all part of the charm of the genre.

Anyway, I’m sick of bad (and good) horror films not getting the attention they so rightly deserve, so I decided to create my own show–Cryptique. It’s like a critique that takes place in a crypt, get it? Eh? Oh, I’m so alone :(

Watch my show!”

Recently, she mysteriously disappeared for a fairly decent span of time, causing something of a stir in the horror community.  Many speculated she had died, and others speculated she had died and come back as a zombie, and still OTHERS simply didn’t give two shits (because they’re fucking assholes). But then she was back with fantastic news.  She had a new, professional cameraman and now she’s in LA shooting for the Miko Macabre Cryptique show and persuing an acting career. She’s apparently just finished season 1.  If there’s a DVD, I’ll be first in line to pick it up.  So, you filthy heathens, get acquainted with the coolest ghoul in horror, MIKO MACABRE:


Top Ten Horror Survival Tools (from our friends at Horror Movies.ca)

Posted on 5th August 2008 by aaron in Uncategorized - Tags: , ,

So the folks over at Horror Movies.ca have posted a playful little list of the top TEN HORROR SURVIVAL TOOLS.  I thought this’d be a fun little conversation starter for Backwoods Horror.  Read the list and comment/make your own list.  Enjoy:

“Top Ten Tools of the Non-Victim

10. Cat – This may seem like an odd way to start this list. But think about it. What better early warning sign could you have? They always howl and run when something is amiss. If they take off, you do too. It’s as simple as that. Plus, make sure to keep their claws long and sharp. If all else fails you could just toss them at your attacker and head for the hills.

9. Wooden Stake – One thing I love about many of these tools is their versatility. Most people hear stake and think vampires. Sure it’s the first thing that comes to mind, but who says you can’t thrust it right through the head of an attacking deadite or two? Step 1) aim pointy end toward foe 2) strike with force , retract, and repeat if necessary. You can even do it Buffy style and keep a slew of them at your side while carousing nightly. People may look at you funny, but at least you won’t be some creature of the shadows’ late night snack.

8. Silver Bullets – So you wanna fight some werewolves do ya? This is the best thing going for you. But what happens if the wolves aren’t biting? That’s no biggie. They may be silver but they are still bullets. One good plug will take out a zombie and throw that slasher to the ground at least long enough to get away one good time before he gets back up and charges again. If you never end up needing them, you can show them off to look badass at bars and parties. You might even consider nestling one on a chain betwixt those manly tufts of chest hair. It could be a useful lycanthrope repellent….even if it would repel most chicks as well.

7. Religious Paraphernalia (Holy Water / Cross / Crucifix) – True enough, these tools are less useful than some but they do have their places. You can never be too sure you won’t be running into a vampire or even the Son of Satan. And hasn’t that cousin of yours been rather puky and gnarly-voiced lately? You may want to pay her a visit with some of these items just to be sure she isn’t harboring an evil soul. Don’t believe in the religious stuff? Fine, Fancypants. Don’t come crying to me when the spawns of Hell are rapping at your door and the best thing you have is a rolled-up Guidepost or Watchtower to shove in their faces. Besides, you just might get thirsty.

6. Rope – Now this one has endless uses: escape ladder, booby trap, tie up the monster, wicked noose, or tug-o-war when you have nothing better to do and the monsters are keeping more to themselves. If you have learned one thing from the Hobbits, you should know that you must always have a good sturdy bit of rope at hand. What if your car gets stuck in the mud or maybe you need to lasso something? Or maybe even some kinky…ahem. How about jumping it to stay in shape for your next foray into battle. I’m telling you it’s a must have.

5. Matches / Lighter – Once again, versatility is key here. Think of all the uses you can have for this item. Resident Evil or Silent Hill anyone? Let’s say you need to make some Molotov cocktails on the fly to rid yourself of that advancing zombie horde. Or how about a little fire, scarecrow? Not convinced? Maybe it’s just freakin’ dark or you want a smoke in the midst of the calamity to calm those jangled nerves. Last but not least, nothing gets rid of bothersome mummies faster than setting fire to their drawers. Those babies have been drying for thousands of years. They will go up faster than Michael Jackson in a Pepsi commercial. Too soon?

*Make that lighter a Zippo. The last thing you need is to be foiled by a poorly timed gust of wind.

4. Machete – As far as weapons go, you won’t get more use out of anything else. Max Brooks recommends this for fighting zombies and he uses his noodle so I’d pay attention. It’s silent, deadly, great for close combat, and it never requires reloading. Keep one of these babies sharp and handy and you’ll be julienning the walking dead like Ron Popeil. Zombies aren’t the only ones that can be decapitated either. Keep that in mind. Also remember that this is Jason’s weapon of choice. He has tried just about everything over the years and always comes back to this. Two Hundred plus dead bodies can’t be wrong.

3. Running Shoes – When the shit goes down and all else fails, run like a fool. This is a surefire to get away from those pesky slow zombies and most stalking slashers, but you have to employ the proper gear. We all know the chicks in heels do NOT make it. So even when you are out for a night on the town, keep some comfy tennies close at hand. You never know when you may need to break and fly.

2. Virginity – Everyone knows this is a guaranteed reprieve. The virgins never die. And though it may suck to be the last one standing because you’ve never been laid, you just might come to appreciate that when the time comes and Mr. Big-ol’-knife is standing over your head trying to decide if you look amorous. Some of us no longer have the ability to use this weapon…but those of you who do should be proud. It’s like a Get Out of Jail Free card. At any rate, hang onto it….at least until Prom Night. Once you’re over that hurdle, it’s most likely smooth sailing until keggers at college. Then you can implement Number One.

1. Slow Buddy – So maybe you lost your virginity a while back to some smooth talking Cajun guy after a crawfish boil….or whatever. Don’t give up just yet. You still have an out. Just make sure you keep some friends around for bait. But don’t be a dumbass and go hanging around the track team for pity’s sake. Scan the gaming stores (Masquerade players would probably just dress goth and attempt to become one with the monster) and the mall food courts. Maybe you could pick up a pal or two at a bowling alley. Even couch potatoes / video gamers could give you a leg up because their’s are too atrophied from sitting on their asses all day. The elderly could be useful to those who tend to be more selfishly inclined. The object here is that you want the ones who cannot outrun you. This is imperative. You don’t have to be faster than the monster, just faster than your friend. A nice bonus would be if they were drunks or stoners…they’d be goners anyway. You know the rules. Work with them and they can save your life. Throw on the old Number Threes (see above) and haul ass.

Honorable Mention:

Common Sense – All the tricked out gear in the armory won’t keep you safe if you insist on doing stupid things, so be warned. Always watch your back and NEVER help cast-armed men load furniture into the back of a van. Stay Aware and Stay Alive. That’s the best I can do. It’s up to you now.”

Review: BLOODSUCKERS FROM OUTER SPACE

I’m going to preface this with a little recognition of a local, independent video store I have around here.  VSI Entertainment is the name of the joint.  Here’s a pic:

Anyhow, this place still carries a shit ton of old VHS titles.  Walking into the place is like Christmas with the kind of old flicks they have there (Which reminds me, I’m overdue on a few.  Jeez)  In any case, I might write more in depth about it later on when I can take some pics of me with some of the more choice and rare titles.

But on with the review, right?  Well, what can I say, this movie was friggin’ sweet!  It had everything a B grade Horror Comedy should have.  Shot in Texas on a budget of about ten cents by a fella by the name of Glen Coburn, the flick takes place in some small, nameless Texas town with a population of about 50.  The movie begins with some kind of freaky space wind blowing in on a farmer only going about doing his chores.  He starts to vomit blood, a LOT of blood, and then dies, only to come back to life as a zombified creature possessed by a BLOODSUCKER FROM OUTER SPACE.

After that, the story follows the path of a young photographer and this young girl who picks him up.  The photographer had previously taken pictures of a crime scene where farm animals had been completely drained of blood, the farmer blaming it all on “those devil worshipping homosexuals”.  Suddenly the deadly space wind strikes the town, turning the entirety of the population into crazed, bloodsucking fiends.

Of course, scientists and the military have taken an interest.  The scientists are trying to study the phenomena while the military, particularly one man (a general I think) simply wants to use the opportunity to nuke the town.  I’m not going to ruin it, but needless to say, hilarious violence ensues.

This movie has crazy, horrible dialogue, worse acting, and simply atrocious effects.  The filmmakers, I think, knew they weren’t going to have the kind of money they’d need to make a full blown horror movie, so they used their shortcommings to their advantage and decided to make a horror comedy that rises far above many of its contemporaries of the period (early 80’s).  So my verdict?  If you can find it, watch it.  I know you can get a dvd here, the only place IN THE WORLD I found to buy a dvd of the movie, and you can get a VHS copy on amazon.  Check out the trailer and a few pics below!


TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE Blu-Ray

Posted on 3rd August 2008 by aaron in News - Tags: , , ,

Happy Birthday to me (September 30th if any of you out there in horror land want to send me a card, or a Blu-Ray player), with the release of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre on Blu-Ray.  What does this mean?  It means I’m going to have to buy a Blu-Ray player now.  I’ve been holding out, but this seems to be about the most “ultimate” edition of the movie I could have (at least for now, heh).  Here’s the scoop from our pals over at Bloody Disgusting:

Dark Sky Films has revealed new information about their upcoming Blu-ray release of THE TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE which is due to hit store shelves on September 30th. Blu-ray.com writes that the video specs have not been released, but audio will come in the form of 5.1 DTS or 2.0 PCM (it is unclear if the DTS will be Master Audio or not). Labeled as a “Ultimate Edition”, this release will feature over three hours of special features, including: Brand new featurette with actress Terri McMinn, created exclusively for this release, Feature-length commentaries with director Tobe Hooper, cinematographer Daniel Pearl, actors Gunnar Hansen, Marilyn Burns, Paul A. Partain, Allen Danzinger, and art director Robert A. Burns, Featurettes “The Texas Chain Saw Massacre: The Shocking Truth” and “Flesh Wounds”, Theatrical trailers and TV and Radio spots, A tour of the Texas Chain Saw Massacre House with Gunnar Hansen, Deleted scenes and outtakes and Blooper reel and still gallery.

Remember Kiddos, save your pennies for September 30th.

Is HELL RIDE Gonna Suck?

Posted on 1st August 2008 by aaron in News - Tags: , ,

Well Hell, I’m a little worried about the upcoming feature film from Larry Bishop entitled HELL RIDE.  On one hand, you’ve got what the filmmakers promise to be a throwback to biker movies of the 60’s.  The kinds of flicks I love like EASY RIDER, THE WILD ANGELS, HELL’S ANGELS ON WHEELS, and the like.  On the other, you’ve got just about every critic out there just voraciously trashing the thing.  Quentin Tarantino’s serving as executive producer on this one under the Quentin Tarantino Presents label which is kind of like one nail in the coffin already.  Sorry to all you KILL BILL and HOSTEL (Quentin Tarantino Presents) fans out there, but the man hasn’t been behind a really good movie since PULP FICTIONGRINDHOUSE doesn’t really count as it was Robert Rodriguez’s entry, PLANET TERROR, that really shined in that one, with Tarantino’s DEATH PROOF didn’t nearly live up to the hype (the only thing it had going for it was a reference to VANISHING POINT).  Most critics are saying that the flick is ridiculous, trying to create an entire film upon the nostalgia factor alone, with some blood, violence, and plenty of T&A thrown in for good measure (not that THAT sort of thing is a problem).  I’ve read that the movie doesn’t really have a leg to stand on as far as the story goes, relying solely upon the premise alone to carry it.

According to Wikipedia, the plot follows as such: Larry Bishop stars as bad-ass biker Pistolero, who along with The Gent (Michael Madsen) and Comanche (Eric Balfour), hit the road to avenge the death of Pistolero’s old lady Cherokee Kisum (Julia Jones), by the 666ers, a rival motorcycle gang. Vinnie Jones and the ultimate bike riding legend Dennis Hopper to star as members of the satanic biker gang the 666ers.

Oh well.  I’ll probably watch it anyway as they’ve succeeded in hooking me on the premise of a biker flick that’s a throwback to all of those biker flicks I loved watching on VHS growing up.  I’m just worried I’m going to be let down just like I was with the second half of GRINDHOUSE.  We’ll see.  Check back here for my review when I see the movie.  Check out the Red Band trailer below:

At Least They Have A Cool Poster…